I hate rushing stuff out. I like projects where I can design, implement, test, review, tweak, etc... I don't mean that I like to take the long route of the old skool software engineering methodologies, either. I like short cycles followed by merciless refactoring, and I believe that design is inevitably going to be evolutionary. So what do I mean by rushing stuff out? Well, what is the essence of rushing something out? Think about it... When do softwares get rushed out? Ah, yes... when the deadline draws near and the corporate finanance dept. tells you that you're not gonna get more budget. If that's the case, then the blame is on the project team. The team should have planned things out better, worked more efficiently, etc. You see this happening in big companies all the time. As a matter of fact, I've witnessed it almost every time I got involved in helping out with commercial projects that deal with the big fortune 500 companies. You have a floor full (say, 200 people) of Microsoft-certified programming drones chugging code out. Yet they can't meet deadlines. Anyway, I digress... Now if this was about a deadline set in advance like the one I just described, then I wouldn't even feel as if I were being rushed. However, not all deadlines are created equal.

I just had two back-to-back crazy deadlines.... The type of deadline that creeps up on you without any notice. In plain English, the type where the project manager hands you a project, then one day decides to surprise you by telling you that the deadline is in 3 days. Yeah, quite literally. Now imagine having two of those back to back. -.-; Now, it's not the project manager's fault, cuz there are some things that are out of their control, and I fully understand that. Don't get me wrong, I'm not whining or complaining. I'm just tired, that's all. What really sucks the most is the feeling that the quality of the work had to suffer because it was rushed. It always aches to see something that has my name on it go out the door without my stamp of approval... *SIGH* Please don't rush me...

I'd hate to be the person who coded the Blaster worm.

Although Blaster is travelling fairly quickly, Huger pointed out it could be infecting at a higher rate if the Blaster code were better designed.

"The worm is poorly written," said [Alfred Huger, senior director of engineering in Symantec's Security response division] ( nwfusion )

Ouch! So much for putting that in your 3l33t h4x0r resume. :P

Within the past 2 days I've gone from having 1 big project and 2 side projects on my hands to 1 big project, 4 medium size projects and 2 side projects. How the hell did this happen???? I sure hope I'm not getting overbooked on projects.... *SIGH*

Continuing on with today's theme ( "panic", is what I was thinking of )... if there is one thing that I really haven't spent enough time on this summer, it's my thesis... I still need to write my Master's thesis and I'm not even sure on what I'm going to write about... Yeah, that's pretty bad... My plan was to finish it this fall semester and audit a course on political econ the following semester before graduating, but I'm beginnig to have doubts... grrr... I'm going to have to meet up with Dr. Kraniou pretty soon to talk about this... He's gonna kill me if he finds out that I'm still not sure about my hypothesis... *SIGH*

Understanding Engineers

Take One

Two engineering students were walking across campus when the first one said, "Where did you get such a great bike?"

The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take what you want."

"The first engineer nodded approvingly, "Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn't have fit."

Take Two

To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.

Take Three

A pastor, a doctor and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers.

The engineer fumed, "What's with these guys? We must have been waiting for 15 minutes!"

The doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen such ineptitude!"

The pastor said, "Hey, here comes the greens keeper. Let's have a word with him."

"Hi George! Say, what's with that group ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?"

The greens keeper replied, "Oh, yes, that's a group of blind firefighters. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always let them play for free anytime."

The group was silent for a moment. The pastor said, "That's so sad. I think I will say a special prayer for them tonight.

"The doctor said, "Good idea. And I'm going to contact my ophthalmologist buddy and see if there's anything he can do for them."

The engineer said, "Why can't these guys play at night?"

Take Four

What is the difference between Mechanical Engineers and Civil Engineers?

Mechanical Engineers build weapons and Civil Engineers build targets.

Take Five

The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with an Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

Take Six

Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the possible designers of the human body. One said, "It was a mechanical engineer." Just look at all the joints."

Another said, "No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system has many thousands of electrical connections. "

The last one said, "Actually it must have been a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?"

Take Seven

Normal people believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet.

Take Eight

An architect, an artist and an engineer were discussing whether it was better to spend time with the wife or a mistress. The architect said he enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid foundation for an enduring relationship.

The artist said he enjoyed time with his mistress, because the passion and mystery he found there.

The engineer said, "I like both."

"Both?"

Engineer: "Yeah. If you have a wife and a mistress, they will each assume you are spending time with the other woman, and you can go to the lab and get some work done."

Take Nine

An engineer was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess." He bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket.

The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week."

The engineer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket.

The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you and do ANYTHING you want."

Again the engineer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket.

Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess, and that I'll stay with you forever and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?"

The engineer said, "Look, I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a girl friend, but a talking frog, now that's cool."

Take Ten:

During the French Revolution and Reign of Terror in the 1790s, a priest, a lawyer and an engineer were caught smuggling aristocrats to safety in England and were condemned to die by the guillotine.

The priest made a special request to be laid on his back under the guillotine "so that he could face his Maker." His request was granted, the executioner pulled the cord, the blade came down but stopped a few centimeters above his neck. French law did not allow a second attempt, so he was set free.

The lawyer, who believed in following precedent, also requested to lie on his back. Again the blade descended, but stuck just above his neck, and he also was set free.

The engineer asked to lie on his back "so that he could watch the mechanism at work." The executioner was just about to pull the cord, when the engineer said, "Hold it! I see the problem. I think I can fix it."