Man, the sight of those juicy white breasts I hooked up with last night still lingers around in my head... Well, Pete was really the guy who had the master plan and made the first move, so I shouldn't give myself credit. I think those were the biggest and most juicy pair I've had the pleasure of nibbling on since forever! Phew! What an orgasmic mouthful... Oh yeah, Pete's my cousin's husband's brother-in-law and those white breasts belonged to a 20lb turkey we got at Costco. ( Caro, this is how you do it. :P )

Yup, I'm down in Leesburg, VA chilling out at my cousin's place. Man, my nephew got big! Actually, he's huge! Seeing little kids run around freely in this gigantic house does seem to remove me from the so-called "real world mentality" and calm me down a bit. So I guess I do enjoy coming down here once in awhile, so long as it really is once in awhile ( let's admit that no matter how much you love'em, you can only take so many naggings from older sisters at any given moment in time ). ;)

Well, so having claimed a bit of peace of mind, it got me thinking about the past a lil bit, and you know I love doing that. :) It's probably true that the recent contraversey at EA got me thinking as well. The exact point in time I was looking back to was my first 2 years straight out of college. No, I never had the privillege of working at a company that overworked their employees. What I did have the privillege to do was work at a company that took me in and treated me as an equal. The company was able to challenge me without intentionally burdening me in a physical way, and it provided a true learning ground on which I could grow. And, as a matter of fact, I'm still there! :D

I was a late bloomer in college in that I didn't completely understand why computer science was so fascinating until Senior year. I blame this entirely on the CMU CS curriculum which is really intended for geniuses who already have ass loads of, well relative to what I had which was close to zilch, background in the subject matter prior to entering college. So by the time graduation came along I was just burning in passion, insanely hungry for more education. Since I was an international student, and getting more allowances from my parents to cover tuition was not an option, I decided to get a job to see if I can get more education that way. So you can imagine what an awesome opportunity I had when I landed my job at MAYA. I became workaholic right away. I completely dropped my daily routine which included spending leisure time, searching for interesting movies, working out, hanging out with friends, spending quality time with my girlfriend, etc... All *poof* gone. I worked very long hours at work, coming home after midnight was common, my relationship started to slowly crumble, my health deteriorated, and the only thing I hadn't let go of was music. But, I was having so much fun! I wouldn't have, and still wouldn't, traded it for anything else. But, it was crystal clear that I was workaholic.

It was only when I had lost my girlfriend that I realized that I seriously needed some rethinking. Yes, it's pathetic that idiots like me need a wake up call once in awhile to learn a lesson, but hey, that's the reality. It's been more than 3 years since then, and I'd like to believe that I've smartened up a bit, but I'm sure I'll be getting shot down several more times before I close my eyes for good. I still have my workaholic nature underneath my skin, I'm just more in control of that beast and I only let it out when it's absolutely necessary. I've also learned how to be more productive and focused, so that makes up for a huge chunk of me not having to be workaholic to actually get quality work done. But one important thing about this is that I'm extremely fortunate to be in an environment where I have the last say in what I decide to do in life. If I were forced to work long hours that basically ground me down until my productivity crossed the point of diminishing, or even negative, returns, I don't think I would have been able to say that I was having fun. And to me, if I'm not having fun, it ain't worth my time.

People in their 20s tend to have seemingly misguided short term goals.... Such goals include trying to strike rich real soon so that they can retire, getting a really nice sports car, or buying that big house. For me, my goal has always been the same, a very simple one at that; I have to be happy. It's certainly possible that those with some of the previously mentioned goals are, ultimately, trying to achieve the same thing. But my point is that, if I were to draw happiness from outside of me, I believe that's just asking for trouble. I must be able to draw happiness from within, and that includes being healthy, being able to find for myself interesting challenges that constantly fascinate me, and just plain learning how to discover all the wonderful things in life that are around me all the time.

This isn't to say that those with goals in life that conflict with mine are wrong. I'm not even saying that I found the true meaning of life, or any grandious claims like that. What I am doing is, first of all, reflecting on my past experience and sharing with you what I've learned from it. Second of all, since it was thanksgiving and all, I wanted to give thanks to the environment in which I'm currently growing and maturing in. And finally, arguably the most important point, I'm trying to return my thanks to our lil nephew JunYoung who gave me this opporunity to reflect. *Muah* Much love, big guy! :D Happy thanks giving!

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When you work in the industry, you're bound to meet various types of people. Some friendly, some cunnng, some short tempered, some obnoxious, etc... There are also times when you never actually get to meet the person, but only end up conversing over e-mail or the phone. After you go through a few of such encounters, you're bound to run into the type of people who put canned signatures at the end of their e-mails, so that it appends some some generic end remarks like "Best regards" on every e-mail message they send followed by their contact info. That, to me, means one of three things

  • The person lacks the creativity to respond to individual e-mails with appropriate, and context sensitive end remarks
  • The person is too lazy to bother spending time to decide what the end remark should be
  • The person doesn't consider e-mail a communication medium where human beings are involved, and thinks that there exists some technical specification that says "The e-mail parser requires that you terminate your message with a 13 bytes long NULL terminated character array that spells 'Best Regards'. Please do not include the single quotes."

I'm sorry, but I can't help but imagine that they have some pent up angst against the world or they're just so jaded and tired that they want to minimize the frequency of human-to-human interaction as much as they can. I'm thinking that if we conductd a turing test between them and the state of the art super computer, they'd fail the test before the super computer would. -.-;

Well, so things got even more interesting today when I called this person up to ask a question about a product they had sold us. This is, as far as I know, standard practice; a vendor sells you stuff, you ask for support, you get it. Pretty simple. The Q&A session goes by without much progress as this person only knows how to say that other people who use this product hasn't asked him about the question I had, and so he was inclined to believe that the problem was not related to their product. Is that a round about way of saying "Dude,I so don't have time for this, I want to go back to my cubicle and back into my world of virtual paradise"??? Ok, so I'm willing to accept that as it is... I guess not everybody has the personality to try and troubleshoot something the way a person with empathy would normally be able to. Fine. Now, here's the kicker. After the phone conversation ends, the person calls back just to tell me that, from now on, he'd prefer if I e-mailed him with questions rather than calling him...


Simply WOW! He also assured me that he's pretty good with e-mails and that he's frequently online. That's awesome, man... I feel so much better! You rock my world!

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In the Corean language, we have a word called "여유", pronounced "Yuh-Yoo". If you look into the root of the word, it's actually a combination of two Chinese characters that mean "left over",餘, and "plentiful",裕, respectively. I really can't think of a good English counterpart, as "spare time" doesn't quite catch the meaning and "gaining luxury in life" gives the wrong impression of greed. For now, please humor me and let me use a working definion of, oh I dunno... how about... "peace of mind"? :)

Well, so you ask why the hell do I bring this word up? It's because we see soooo many of us that are living lives without it. That, of course, includes the good ol' struggling yours truly. ;) It seems like the first thing that happens when we don't actually have 여유 in life is tht we end up working for time and time does not work for us. So, naturally, we end up feeling like we don't have enough time to do all the things we want to do. One of the biggest problems that can result from this is that we may no longer feel like we have the time to care for other people. We find ourselves flashing the "too busy" flag without realizing what kind of effect that may have on others. Then we tend to shrivel up and isolate ourselves from them, claiming that we need to "get our lives back in order". But in reality we don't end up spending time getting our lives back in order, we simply try to patch together a short term fix only to fall right back into the perpetual chasing game where we're fugitives of time.

As time goes by, we become more and more lonely and may eventually lose any sense of satisfaction from life, and perhaps even display symptoms of depression. This is a spiral of doom that nobody should have to go down. It seems rather ironic that the fact that we're spending all the time looking after our own selves and not others' ends up making us feel even more miserable, doesn't it?

I don't remember who said it, but there is a saying that goes something like "give, when you're most in need" and I think that really catches the essence. It is probably the time when we think we're most busy that we should open your mind up and proactively offer help to our closest friends. It's one thing to passively tell them that they should let us know when they need help, and quite another to proactively offer a helping hand before they have to muster up the courage to do so. And if we can do that, I think we're well on our way to having a true 여유 in our lives. Ah~ Let's all giddy up and act on this today!!!! Waddaya say??? :D

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You may kiss the burger... BIYAAAAAATTTTCH!

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