It's quite painful not being able to share the things I'm working on. It's funny that I feel that way as I've always thought that I never had the desire to be popular in the music industry. Why? Cuz I tend to have a "I-just-want-to-make-music-I-like" attitude most of the time. However, in recent years as I'm working closely with others and entering competitions here and there it occured to me that maybe, just maybe, I do care about my audience. With the types of music I've been working on recently I can also see myself feeding off of various others' interpretations of them. As an artist paints one's emotion, there are times when they wish others would relate, but then there are also times when they wonder how differently it would be interpreted to people with varying backgrounds. Perhaps I'm starting to yearn more for the latter, I dunno. Heck, I'm not even sure if I'm allowed to even have the word "artist" anywhere on my site.

Well, so why can't I share what I'm working on these days? Simply because I'm not done. "Well, so???" You may ask and I can only tell you that I just don't want to share half-assed things with others. -- I should be clear that it's not as if there are hundres of fans I'm trying to deliver this to. I don't believe I have any, and I'd like to keep it that way for now. It's more of my own desire to want to share my work with others that's causing me pain. -- So I've basically been spending a lot of time getting more fundamental education in music these days, but another thing I'm trying to is to really immerse myself into the original pure sounds of traditional Korean drums, 70s funk and jazz as well as trip hop/nu-jazz stuff from all around the world. To me, listening to how a particular genre of music got started and labelled is a very important history lesson. As people in various professions need to study history to understand various different aspects of their area, I feel the need to understand why a certain type of music is a certain way before I can fully understand exactly why the sound it produces peak my senses.

Digging for New Orleans jazz, swing, bebop, cool jazz, hard bop, free jazz, and the more fusion style is as time consuming as it can get, but when I find something that inspires me, it's all time well spent. I should add that the more I dig in, the more I get mesmerized by the rather chaotic yet controlled nature of the genre dubbed Jazz. Plus I can't help but move to the rhythm it brings about (espeicllay Piano Jazz)! Same is true for the irresistible sound of funk and the wild Korean traditional drums. I have to admit that I do find it rather daunting from time to time when I come to my senses and question myself for daring to think that I can fathom these different genres and come up with something new that I can honestly call original music. But, hey... I guess it's the good ol' aim for the sun and we'll hit the moon kinda attitude ;)

The sheer amounts of music I'm listening to these days alone is pretty significant to say the least, but I can't think of a better way to try and understand the sound that I'm after. I've given myself 2 years from now to complete the project I've begun, and lemme tell you that I'm in no rush. ;) This is a very exciting time for me!